RassieComics

Rugby logic applied to absolutely everything.

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The cast of the Rassieverse

Characters

The recurring cast of the Rassieverse, in two halves: the people around Rassie, and the people around the team.

Main cast

Rassie, his dog and the neighbours, supporters and family who keep turning up in the comics.

  • Illustrated portrait of Rassie: short grey-flecked dark hair, lined face, chin slightly lifted, in a white collared shirt against a deep green background.

    The Coach

    Rassie

    Real-world-inspired parody

    A cap, dark glasses and a game plan for absolutely everything, including the grocery run.

    A parody character inspired by South African rugby coaching culture. He is not the real person, and nothing he says in the Rassieverse is a real quote.

    Appears in

  • Illustrated portrait of Rassie’s dog, a cheerful white English bulldog with a wrinkled face and his tongue out, beside the braai.

    The Assistant Coach

    Rassie’s Dog

    A white English bulldog who has attended every braai, supervised every fire and never once been asked to leave.

    He does not know the plan. He knows there is one, and that it involves meat.

    Appears in

  • Illustrated portrait of Oom Kallie, a grey-bearded man in a khaki bucket hat, grinning with braai tongs beside the fire.

    The Braai Master

    Oom Kallie

    Has run the street braai for 31 years. Deeply suspicious of whiteboards.

    Oom Kallie believes a braai should be judged by feel, smoke and the number of neighbours who drift over.

  • Illustrated portrait of Tannie Marietjie, a smiling grandmother with silver curls and glasses, holding a green jersey in a stadium.

    Keeper of the Lucky Jersey

    Tannie Marietjie

    Owns a spare jersey for every emergency and has not missed an anthem since 1995.

    If you need a jersey, a rusk or a strongly worded opinion about the referee, Tannie Marietjie has one in her handbag.

  • Illustrated portrait of Lerato, a confident woman with her hair in a bun and gold hoop earrings, hands on hips in an office.

    The Friday Jersey Enforcer

    Lerato

    Runs the office, the family group chat and the Friday dress code with equal authority.

    Lerato is the reason the whole office owns a jersey, and the reason nobody forgets the fixtures.

  • Illustrated portrait of Thabo in a green beanie with a gold stripe, grinning with a mug by a rainy window.

    The 3am Supporter

    Thabo

    Lives overseas, sleeps in two-hour blocks during tournaments and has never missed a kick-off.

    Thabo’s neighbours know the fixtures better than he does, mostly because of the celebrations.

  • Illustrated portrait of Gogo Nomsa, a laughing grandmother in a green headwrap and patterned dress, holding a mug of tea.

    The Durban Matriarch

    Gogo Nomsa

    Runs the family group chat from Durban, records a voice note for every try and has never once been late for a parade.

    Gogo Nomsa believes the good spots go at four in the morning, and she has been right every time.

  • Illustrated portrait of Anika, a smiling young woman with long blonde hair in a green rugby top, holding her phone.

    The Perth Supporter

    Anika

    Watches every Test from a flat in Perth, sends thirty-seven voice notes per try and met Thabo on the family video call.

    Anika has work at seven. She has never let that stop a celebration.

  • Illustrated portrait of Bra Sipho, a grinning older man with white hair and a white beard in a green jersey, giving a thumbs up.

    The Aerial Holder

    Bra Sipho

    Held the village TV aerial on a roof for an entire Test match. His calls are still the clearest in the Eastern Cape.

    Bra Sipho has not seen a single try live. He has been responsible for all of them.

  • Illustrated portrait of Bra Tshepo, a grinning young taxi driver in a green jersey leaning out of a green minibus.

    The Taxi Driver

    Bra Tshepo

    Drives the green minibus, saves the front seat for anyone in a jersey and swears he never moved early.

    Bra Tshepo knows every shortcut in the city and every rule in rugby, and believes both are negotiable.

Team room

The captain, the crews and the staff who actually get a squad onto a field.

  • Illustrated portrait of Siya, the captain, smiling with his arms folded on a training field at sunset.

    The Captain

    Siya

    Real-world-inspired parody

    Leads from the front, keeps the team talk short and somehow ends up carrying everyone’s bags as well.

    A respectful parody character inspired by South African rugby captaincy. He is not the real person, and nothing he says in the Rassieverse is a real quote.

  • Illustrated portrait of the Rugby Bomb Squad: seven very different big forwards in green T-shirts, grinning in front of a glowing doorway.

    The Fresh Legs

    The Rugby Bomb Squad

    Seven enormous friends who arrive at the 50th minute of any event and change the result.

    They are always late. It is always on purpose. The party is always better for it.

  • Illustrated portrait of three assistant coaches in green: a grey-bearded man with glasses and a tablet, a big bald man with a moustache and a ginger-haired man with a headset.

    The Assistants

    The Coaching Staff

    An attack coach with ninety lineout options, a scrum coach with forearms like fence posts and a defence coach who has never blinked.

    Fictional characters. They are not based on any real coach, and their slide decks are entirely their own fault.

  • Illustrated portrait of a team manager with a headset and clipboard, a smiling physio with taped wrists and a moustached kit manager holding a green kit bag.

    The People Who Actually Run Things

    The Management Team

    A team manager who has already planned the queue, a physio with tape for everything and a kit manager who can find one missing sock among forty bags.

    Fictional characters. Nothing leaves for the airport until the Team Manager has ticked it off.

“The Rugby Bomb Squad” is a fictional rugby parody inspired by the nickname for South Africa’s impact replacements — bench players who come on later in the match, often around the 50-minute mark, to bring fresh energy and disrupt the opposition. It has nothing to do with an actual bomb squad.