Boogeyman
The boogeyman is sure he heard something under the bed. He looks, and finds Rassie down there with a clipboard, checking the setup.
Comics
Infinity
Nobody can count to infinity. Rassie is asked how far he can count, and the analysts find out he has already done it — twice.
The Plan
Plan A is not working and Plan B is worse. Rassie does not reach for a third one — he keeps the shape, fixes the spacing and asks for support earlier.
Rome
Rome has the plans, the meetings and the delays. Then a specialist arrives who would rather move the blocks than price the job.
The Watch
Training starts at nine sharp. It starts when Rassie says it starts, and every watch on the field catches up with him.
Houston
Mission control runs out of options, so they phone a man on a stoep in South Africa. Move the one oke there, then use the space properly.
Staalwol & ’n Hilux
An oom hands Rassie a ball of steel wool and asks what he plans to do with it. Rassie asks for five minutes.
If Rassie Did Trophies
More trophies arrive at the office. Rassie makes them sit the squad interview first.
If Rassie Did the Backup Plan
An assistant asks about the backup plan. Rassie picks up the phone and calls it in.
If Rassie Did the Garden
A lawn mowed in pitch stripes, a flowerbed with a defensive structure and a yellow card for the dog.
Excess Baggage
Forty players, one check-in counter and a team manager who has planned the queue down to the kilogram.
If Rassie Did a Kids’ Birthday Party
Pass-the-parcel as a set piece, musical chairs with a TMO and a cake delivered with perfect timing.
If Rassie Did the Road Trip
Joburg to the coast on a strict driver rotation, with the biltong bench coming on at the hour mark.
The Captain’s Team Talk
Three hours of analysis, 147 slides and one captain who only needs a few words.
If Rassie Did the School Run
Team selection at 06:00, cones in the bakkie and a lunchbox thrown in from touch.
If Rassie Did the Grocery Shopping
A Saturday supermarket run, planned like a Test match. Seven trolleys. One loaf of bread.
Rassie Facts
Rassie Fact #025: The right plan
Rassie doesn't make a plan the plan makes sure rassie is right
Submitted by Kevin Edwards
Rassie Fact #020: The CV
When Rassie says “lekker,” somewhere in New Zealand a rugby analyst updates his CV.
Submitted by Hendro Greeff
Rassie Fact #019: The trophies
Rassie doesn’t chase trophies.Trophies know where he lives.
Rassie Fact #018: The plan
When Rassie says “we’ve got a plan,”New Zealand checks the departure board.
Rassie Fact #007: The set piece
Rassie doesn’t do small talk.He does set-piece talk.
Rassie Fact #001: The backup plan
Rassie doesn’t have a backup plan.The backup plan has Rassie’s number.